The other day I had a pain in my back so I decided to follow some advice and stretch out my back using a tennis ball to loosen up my sore muscles. After a while I just stood there with my back against the wall and in that moment I had a thought. Is the wall holding me up or am I holding the wall up? It may seem like a rather pedestrian question but the wonder being is everything truly connected? Or maybe the question is, what makes us feel like we are against the wall, it is a result of our own action or inaction, or a sense of being held captive by something like secrets, relationships, employment or underemployment, estrangement, or animosity. Oddly enough that list feels rather negative to me, however, there are components which can be life-giving and/or liberating. I suppose it is all about perspective, the ability to see the light rather than the dark, the ability to see the forest for the trees, the ability to see a bigger picture, a sense that all shall be revealed in due time.
When I think of the movies and the sense of having a back against the wall, it is usually in terms of feeling trapped, unable to find a viable option for escape. I wonder if the best option is just being still, instead of trying to frantically look for a way out. What if the best way out is the way you came in and it is merely a matter of patience and persistence, being a calm presence instead of a nervous one, just soaking it all in rather than fearfully needing to react without thinking. Hmm. Perhaps a back against the wall is actually a good position to be in. I wonder.